– understanding it and what you can do about it…
If there was such a thing as a thermometer to measure anxiety, then I expect that for most of you, it would have registered boiling hot at least once in your life.
Anxiety happens – we can’t stop it. But we can control our response to it. We want to keep it away from the top of said thermometer.
Everybody has felt some form of anxiety during 2020 as the coronavirus pandemic has been unleashed on us. But what exactly is anxiety?
Its worth understanding it a little more, so that it does not over-whelm us.
The following write-up is not medical – I’m not medically trained. But they are my observations gleaned from working with some amazingly successful people. Successful people who had anxiety. Even high achievers have anxiety.
In our minds…
Anxiety is best thought of as what we think about – in other words, what goes on in our minds. It is a somewhat primitive function and we feel anxiety when our mind becomes fixated on what we perceive to be negative, uncertain, dangerous or threatening. It is actually protective and part of our survival system.
The key point is that “negative, uncertain, dangerous or threatening” is often based on our perception rather than on 100% true facts.
Anxiety can occur during good times – when you’re about to achieve something great and it can be felt in bad times, for example when a loved one is in an emergency hospital.
So if anxiety can occur anytime and automatically, then we’re in trouble aren’t we?
No!
What matters is learning how to respond to anxiety. We can control our responses – you can be trained to respond better.
Here are 3 common ways in which anxiety can show up. Next time you find yourself anxious, see if one of these applies:
1. Anxiety based on seeking threats
This is when your mind searches the environment for what you fear (consciously or subconsciously), and is often associated with your mind assigning meaning to harmless events.
The classic example is seen in those old black and white horror movies, where the characters (and you) are on high alert when a door creaks – your mind is anticipating a danger and that is why you get edgy.
And in the real world, this can show up for example if you might feel unable to speak up at meetings, because you had previously misinterpreted the response from the chair, and now feel uncomfortable to contribute for fear of further negative. You might begin to avoid interactions with certain people. This is clearly unhelpful for you or your organisation
If you don’t suffer from this form of anxiety, then look out for a colleague who might well do. You’ll be doing them a huge favour with your support.
2. Anxiety based on creating a catastrophe
Sometimes, our mind can jump to the worst case scenario.
For example, suppose that you are in charge of reporting numbers to your seniors, but the end of day reports have not run properly. You fear the worst – maybe for your organisation – maybe for your position. There could be a perfectly valid reason for the missing data and the impact might be small, but you get carried away and fear the worst. You or your manager or another team might start to “catastrophise” and that may not be helpful…
Regularly making a mountain out of a molehill can significantly raise anxiety levels and be very destructive.
3. Anxiety based on what-if scenarios
Anxiety can occur if you focus on too many things outside of your control and then have ‘what-if’ thoughts around them. There is probably very little that you can do, except to ‘get out of the way’, so don’t over-dwell and worry. Manage the risk as best as you can and then move on…
If you are a worrier by nature, then only worry about what you can control, not what you can’t control. Its important for you to make that distinction.
I do wonder if people who work in trading or risk management suffer from this more than the rest of society. Their job involves looking at ‘what if’ scenarios all the time. They have to – otherwise there could be large financial losses. Does that way of thinking show up outside of their workplace and then cause anxiety?
Also, if you are the kind of person who spends too much time focusing on the future, rather than the now, there is a likelihood of you suffering from this kind of anxiety based upon hypothetical scenarios. It can also show up if you are very risk averse or very uncomfortable with uncertainty.
What can we do about anxiety?
We now know about anxiety, but what can we do about anxiety.
One way to overcome anxiety is actually via thought and action.
Anxiety as I have described above starts with the mind’s response. Therefore, a better response is required. By understanding our anxiety better, we can respond better. Once you become more aware, you have the chance to accept what is happening for what it really is – not what you think it is. That allows us to respond better.
We respond to what goes into our minds and what generates thought…
Our consumption of news and information can increase anxiety. Most news items in public media are written with a fixation on negativity or bad-news. They are often written in a way that over-hypes or sensationalises the situation. This grabs your attention and actually causes a higher level of anxiety. So controlling what information you consume can be a great first step. Be aware of what you are taking in and as I said above, accept what is happening for what it really is – not what you think it is!
With acceptance, we can let go of the unhelpful thoughts that lead to anxiety.
The next step is to start taking actions. Action trumps everything.
- If you take an action, your mind can stop scanning for the threats that caused your anxiety.
- If you take an action, your mind can stop thinking about the worst case scenario – you’ll actually move one step closer to the best case scenario.
- If you take an action, your mind can stop thinking about things you can’t control and you will avoid going down a rabbit hole of what-ifs.
Anxiety is a serious matter and I don’t want to trivialise it, but I hope the above is helpful for when you might be feeling anxious and becoming over-whelmed. The thing about anxiety is that you often get to choose the outcome – but only if you choose to think about what is behind the anxiety. A couple of questions to ponder..
What different thoughts can you now choose to think?
What different responses can you now choose to have?
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A little bit about me..
I am a professional coach and some of my clients call me their ‘trusted adviser’. I mentor and guide leaders from the investment banking and FinTech industries so that they are able to make an impact and create a legacy.
I started work in the investment banking industry in the mid-1990s. I have been fortunate to have worked in some of the top firms and with many amazing high-achievers.
My clients have already achieved conventional success and they always inspire me. That’s my pre-condition to work with them. In return, I draw the best out of them and inspire them to achieve success beyond conventional success – exponential success – 10x success – so that they can create an extraordinary impact.
And they will always get there faster and easier than they thought possible!